A Letter from Texas/Two Steps in Court

This has been a long week. 

When we set out to adopt Sofani people told us that there would be bumps on the road and that we would be frustrated because of the lack of control we would experience during the adoption process.  Since January things have been smooth sailing.  We hit our first bump last week and it felt like a pothole.  Let me explain what happened. 

There are two steps in the court proceedings in Ethiopia.  One is attended by the child’s closest relatives.  This happened last Thursday.  In Sofani’s case it was attended by his Aunt.  It’s also important to know that Sofani has a younger sister, Liya, that was adopted to a family in the U.S. about a year ago.  At last week’s hearing, the Judge wanted to know if Liya’s family wanted to adopt Sofani and keep the two siblings together.  As hard as this was to hear, we truly appreciate the Judge’s concern for the kids and held our breath as our agency worked to find Liya's parents.

Last Thursday and Friday seemed like a week.  Finally, on Friday evening, we heard from Sally (the caseworker from our agency).  She informed us that she tracked down Liya’s parents with the help of another agency and they weren't going to stand in our way.  They also said that they would be willing to write a letter to the Judge saying that they weren’t able to take Sofani and would work with us to keep Sofani and Liya in touch with one another once he was in the U.S.  We were thrilled.  We weren’t having any luck getting answers about Liya and her new family.  We’re grateful that the Judge asked the question and prompted the search that led us to this information.

Tonight we’re expecting to learn Liya’s parent’s names, their exact location and contact information.  At this point all that we know is that they live in Texas. 

Liya’s parent’s letter will accompany ours and will be given to the Judge at the family’s next hearing on Monday, May 14th.  We pray that the Judge accepts these letters and will assign a court date for the second step.  We also pray that the Judge will assign a court date for us during Monday’s proceedings.   This will mean that Staci and I will have a new travel date and can make arrangements to resume our plans and finally see Sofani.  We cannot wait.  It is difficult to think about anything else.

We put together a care package for Sofani that was shipped this morning.  He has a picture book with photos of our house, family, friends, aunts, uncles, church, school, etc.  Staci wrote descriptions under each picture so he could begin to visualize his new surroundings in Selma.  Staci also filled the box with a new outfit, Lego’s, candy and letters from each of us. 

Papaw Tom also installed the bunk bed system in Jackson and Sofani’s room.  I wish I would have had something like this in my fraternity house.  It’s unbelievable. 

We also learned that Sofani has become friends with two girls (sisters) ages 7 and 12 in the transition home in Addis.  Ironically, they’re going to be adopted to a family less than two hours from us in Ohio.  I made contact with them last night.  I’m happy that Sofani is going to have some friends to call and visit when he arrives.

If you’re praying for our new family to be united, please pray that the Judge accepts our documents, that we’re assigned a new court date very soon and for our son.  Sofani knows that we were delayed.  I have to think this was as disappointing for him as it was for us.  Please pray that Sofani remains hopeful and courageous. 

Unsettling News

Today in Addis Ababa Sofani’s extended family had to appear in court to meet with the Judge as part of the adoption process.   This is a standard court hearing that is typically uneventful – more procedural than anything.

Things didn’t go as planned and there has been a delay in the process.  Staci and I are distraught and are asking for your prayers.

First, this is a new Judge.  She began on May 1^st.  Alemu, our representative from the International Agency in Addis, said that it was his first encounter with her in court.  She requested additional information to be provided; thus reassigning a new court date for Sofani’s extended family.  They have to reappear in court on May 14^th.  Staci and I will not be traveling to Addis as planned next week.  God willing we’ll be rescheduled later this month.

The issue is that Sofani has a 7 year old sister that was adopted to a family in the U.S. about a year ago.  We’ve known this all along and have intended to track them down and reunite Sofani with his sister when he arrives in the U.S.  We want them to know each other and stay in contact.  The Judge feels that this family should be contacted first and given an opportunity to adopt Sofani.  That’s not at all what we wanted to hear.

Sally, our representative from the International Agency in Michigan, is now in contact with the agency that Sofani’s sister’s parents used to let them know what the Judge said today.  Sally gave their agent all of the background on how I met Sofani and how Sofani wound up in the transition home in Addis.  I have requested that they give my information to the family so that I can talk with them about our story with Sofani.  I am dying to speak with them.  I want them to know how God has led us to this point and plead with them to allow the process to make Sofani our son to continue.

Of course we want them to say that they don’t want to adopt him but it’s definitely a possibility that they could decide that they wanted to pursue him.  If the roles were reversed I could certainly understand their position and their desire to keep them together.  My prayer is that they’ll be touched by our story and understand how close we are to adopting Sofani having just gone through this emotional rollercoaster themselves a year ago.  I pray.

If the Sofani’s sister’s parents allow us to continue, we believe that they will have to produce a document to this effect to accompany Sofani’s extended family in court in Addis on the 14^th.  What exactly the Judge is looking for needs to be clarified.  This is in the works as I type this.

As you know this has been a smooth and tremendously joyful process to this point.  We have reached our first bump in the road.  When we entered into the process we knew that it wouldn’t go exactly as planned because of all the variables out of our control, but you never want to experience anything that could completely derail our course.

This afternoon’s events have ripped our guts out.  It has prompted us to ask the question, “What if God has been using us this entire time to reunite Sofani with his sister?”  “How could we get this far in the process and have something like this happen?”

I ask you to pray that God’s will be done.  If Sofani is meant to be our son then allow things to progress.  Pray for Sofani’s sister’s parents as they’re faced with this decision.  Pray for the Judge and her ruling.  Pray for my family.  And, most importantly, pray for Sofani.